Yamamoto Kyoya slicked back his semi-long, bleached hair. Then, after looking in the mirror, he decided it looked too neat and carefully messed up parts of it to give a rougher, more sloppy appearance. With great care, he tucked half of his shirt into his pants in a deliberately rumpled manner while leaving the other half out. After a bit of consideration, he decided to only leave the top two buttons of his shirt unbuttoned. He would have liked to go as far as three or maybe even four, but it was a chilly morning. It would warm up quickly in the spring sun, but Kyoya honestly wasn’t very good with the cold. With care and deliberation, he picked out a single earring with an imitation wolf fang hung from a silver chain. Then, he picked out a thick, robust faux-gold chain to put around his neck, creating a deliberate mismatch between the two pieces of jewellery. The jacket of his school uniform was carelessly slung over his shoulder. He couldn’t actually wear the thing unless it got much colder. It wouldn’t suit his image. “I swear, trying to look half-assed takes way too much effort…” With his preparations in place, he left his room and descended the stairs. “Good morning, father. Mother.” His mother gave him a small nod, while his father sent him a look of open distaste. “The head of the Nekoyama family certainly has some distasteful hobbies, making young men dress up as hooligans for his daughter’s amusement.” “I am simply performing the part that was assigned to me, father.” “As you should. This connection to the Nekoyama family has allowed me to secure several lucrative contracts. However, you must take care that no record or evidence of this disgraceful behaviour remains once this ludicrous charade comes to an end. It would be detrimental to your future as my successor.” “Of course, father.” Clearly considering the morning’s discourse to be completed, his father went back to his newspaper. Kyoya simply finished his meal, excused himself and left for school. But he couldn’t quite keep himself from grinding his teeth as he walked the path to school. Thankfully, looking scary worked for the role he had been given, so he allowed himself the emotional outlet of muttering under his breath. “My future as your successor, huh? You can shove your stupid little accounting firm right up your ass, old man. The moment I graduate you’re never seeing me again.” Honestly, every moment he spent playing the old man’s dutiful son felt like someone was scraping a cheese grater against his very soul. But it wouldn’t be long now. Just three more years. With the addition of his wages for this role, his savings should just about be enough to move to Kyoto and pay for his living costs for a few years. That should be far enough away from the old man, so he could study drama and stage acting in peace. Kyoya slammed his fist into the wall next to Matsumoto Taro’s head. The short but lanky boy made a very decent show of looking intimidated. “Hey, Taro. You’re coming with me this afternoon, got it?” “Ah, I would of course be delighted to accompany you, Kyoya-shi, but as it happens I have a prior arrangement with the film clu…” Taro faltered as Kyoya leaned in further, the taller boy seemingly towering over the cowering nerd. “Yeah, but you’re going to tell them something came up, and then you’re going to meet me at the station after school. Understand?” “I do hope you’re not causing any trouble for the young man, Mr. Yamamoto. You should be well aware of school policy related to bullying. Kyoya looked over his shoulder and gave the teacher standing behind him a toothy grin. “Not at all, teach. Taro and I are good buddies. Ain’t that right, Taro?” “Ah, um, yes. Indeed. No problems here, teacher.” “Well, if you say so, Mr. Taro. But remember that the school administration will always listen if you have any problems.” “I will keep that in mind, thank you, teacher.” “Yeah, thanks teach. You’re a pearl.” “Mind your manners, Mr. Yamamoto.” “Whatever you say, teach.” “Sorry about all that earlier, Taro. But you know I can’t just invite you normally when we’re at school.” “Don’t worry about it, Mr. Yamamoto. You never know when the young lady might see you, after all.” “Hey, use the nickname properly.” “Why? I know I said you never know when the young lady might be watching, but I really doubt her father would let her wander around Akihabara. Not without a retinue of bodyguards or something, anyway.” “Still, it’s no good to get too lax. What if you slipped up at school?” “But calling you ‘Kyoya-shi’ in public is a bit…” “We’re in Akihabara, Taro. The place is packed with weird nerds. Nobody’s even going to react to something as tame as a weird nickname.” “I suppose that’s true, but still…” “I can’t afford to screw up this role, Taro. I need the money.” “You seem to need a lot of money, Kyoya-shi. I was shocked to hear you’re looking for a part-time job on top of everything.” “Even with the salary we’re getting, my money will barely cover what I need to do after high school. If I want any spending money at all, I need a job.” “Well, I know a place that’s hiring, and the manager is a relative of mine, so I can certainly introduce you. But are you sure a butler café is your style?” “Don’t underestimate me, Taro. I’m an actor. I can handle whatever role you throw at me.” “Well, if you say so. This is the place, by the way.” Kyoya looked at the shop’s sign. “The Princess’s Tea Garden, is it? Pretty fancy name.” “Yeah, my aunt runs the place. She’s into that kind of stuff. Anyway, I’ll introduce you, but I can’t stay. I work just down the street and my shift starts in fifteen minutes.” “All right. How about we meet up after my trial shift ends? I can tell you how it went.” “Sure. There’s pretty big café about a block away that I like. We could meet up there.” “Sounds like a plan.” Frankly, Kyoya was almost shocked that the crazy lady running this place was able to rustle up a suit that would fit him so quickly. And he had to admit, with his bleached hair properly styled and a pair of blue colour contacts in place, his appearance was quite magnificently transformed from ‘rowdy delinquent’ to ‘exotic gentleman’. The manager had been over the moon about it. But it meant nothing unless he could play the part properly. So when a young woman dressed in an oversized anime t-shirt walked inside, he bowed deeply to her, his head upturned to meet her gaze. “Welcome to the tea garden, my princess. Please, allow this humble servant to guide you to your seat.” Given the young woman’s excited little squeak, he figured he was doing a good job. Kyoya leaned back in his seat with a tired groan. “Posing for photos is exhausting. I had like forty people ask me for commemorative photos. Over a two hour shift!” “Sounds like things went well, Kyoya-shi.” “Maybe too well. Sure, I was hired and all, but I think some of the other employees were upset that I was stealing the spotlight.” “It will be fine once the novelty dies down. The regulars will go back to their established faves, and you’ll start building your own loyal following. That’s how it always goes when you add a newcomer to the cast of a concept café like that.” “Sounds like you have a lot of experience with that kind of thing. Do you have a concept café you frequent or something?” Taro hesitated for a moment, then shook his head. “The other way around. I work at the crossdressing café five doors down from The Princess’s Tea Garden.” Kyoya raised an eyebrow. “For real?” Taro shrugged. “I’m short and slender and I have very neutral facial features that work well with makeup. Women’s clothes look good on me.” “Really? Cause I’d say your face is kinda gaunt and drawn. No offence.” “That’s just my ‘insufferable nerd’ makeup.” “Wait, you go to school every day in full costume makeup? Respect, man. That takes dedication.” “Thank you.” “So, your customers are the type who are into the glasses look, then?” Taro shook his head. “I usually wear contacts. These glasses aren’t nearly as thick as they seem. The frames are just designed to make them look that way.” “Huh. Think you could give me some makeup tips? If you can pull off both ‘gaunt nerd’ and ‘pretty girl’, you must be pretty skilled.” “Want to see some pictures?” “Hell yeah I do!” With a smile, Taro unlocked his phone and Started scrolling through pictures of one of the most beautiful girls Kyoya had ever seen. And then another girl. And another. It wasn’t until the sixth girl or so that Kyoya started spotting the similarities between the women… “Holy shit, these are all you!” “Um, yeah? I told you.” “I mean, sure, but they all look so different! You’re way too good at this!” Taro actually flushed a little at the compliment. “Thanks, man.” “So, are these all for work, or?” “Only the generic ones. We don’t cosplay as copyrighted characters at the café for legal reasons. Those are from cosplay events and private photoshoots.” “That’s so cool. But why are you always alone in these pictures? Don’t you ever do pair cosplays or anything?” “I don’t really have any cosplay friends or anything like that. The other guys at the café don’t cosplay outside work, I don’t get along very well with girls, and as a crossdressing guy, asking some other guy to do a pair cosplay is a little…” “Yeah, I can see how that might be a little awkward…” Kyoya kept looking through the photos on Taro’s phone. He’d never really thought much about cosplay before. Costumes for stage acting, sure, but that was kind of different. But on the other hand, ever since the conversation with his father this morning, he had felt an intense urge to leave as much evidence behind as possible of the kind of stuff his father hated. Well, as long as his father didn’t find out about it before he graduated and left home, anyway. And the idea of going to a cosplay event and being photographed by hundreds of people… “Hey, so… How about I do some pair cosplays with you? Like, I won’t crossdress, but if there’s some male-female character pairing you’ve been wanting to do, I could play the part of the male character.” Taro very nearly dropped his phone in shock. “Really? You mean it?” “Sure, it sounds fun.” Aoki Sumomo was not at all pleased with the situation she was in. The perpetual thorn in her side that was Mitsuba Ayako had somehow managed to get her caught up in a planned karaoke outing with the Nekoyama heiress, and as always, Sumomo simply couldn’t bring herself to refuse when the heiress was involved. And being the perpetual introverted loner that she was, Sumomo had never been to a karaoke box in her life. The production staff had cast her in the role of an introverted boy’s love fanatic for a reason. Getting invited out to Karaoke was the last thing she had expected from her high school life. Not willing to make a fool of herself in front of the heiress, she had gathered her courage, cornered Ayako when she was alone and demanded that the girl take her out to a karaoke box before the planned outing so she could practice. And the fact that Ayako not only accepted instantly, but actually seemed happy about it, only served to make Sumomo’s mood worse. Of course, the two of them couldn’t be seen leaving school together for no good reason. That wouldn’t be in character for Sumomo. So they had arranged for Sumomo to go to a café far from school by herself after her club activities were done for the day, and for Ayako to arrive separately and meet her there. It was a massive hassle, but it was better than looking stupid in front of the heiress. But of course, the only reason she was in this mess to begin with was because of… “Heya! How’s it hanging, Susu?” “Shh! Not so loud.” “Please, we’re at some random café in Akihabara. It’s not like Mimi is going to find us here.” “It’s the principle of the thing. And stop calling me Susu!” “Can’t do that. Mimi decided you’re Susu, and what Mimi says goes.” “I can’t believe you somehow got the Nekoyama heiress to start giving people cutesy nicknames.” “Hey, that one was all her idea. The only real influence I’ve had on the lady is her nails.” “The nails are bad enough.” “Come on, those nails are a work of art. Besides, she one hundred percent makes it work.” That much was true, as much as Sumomo hated to admit it. Nekoyama Michiru had the appearance and demeanour of a princess, and by all rights fingernails painted with an orange-to-yellow fade and set with elaborate patterns of tiny fake gemstones should clash horribly with her look and persona. But for some reason, it nevertheless managed to look really good on the heiress… “Anyway, I’m so glad you invited me out for karaoke practice, Susu. I’ve never actually been to a karaoke box before, so I was kinda worried I’d do something stupid.” Sumomo stared at Ayako in disbelief. “Wait, what?” “I didn’t have a lot of friends in middle school, and the friends I had weren’t really into Karaoke, so I didn’t have any reason to go.” “But… I… What? What kind of extroverted Gal has never been to a karaoke box?” Ayako laughed out loud. “Come on, Susu! That’s just the character I’m playing at school. I was scouted because of my makeup tutorials, and they wanted me to play a Gal role. So I started working on my tan and studying flashier makeup styles. I’m just a cosmetics nerd IRL.” “But you’re so… loud! Like, you’re always in the middle of everything, taking up space and being loud and talking to absolutely everyone about everything!” “So? You’re being pretty loud yourself.” Sumomo suddenly realized that she was kind of making a scene in a public space, and immediately shrank in on herself as a bright flush blossomed across her face. “Um, sorry.” “It wasn’t a criticism. It’s fine to be loud. Look, my ex girlfriend taught me a great trick for not getting embarrassed.” “…What’s that then?” “You look deep inside yourself, and you find the part of you that tells you everyone is looking at you and judging you…” “And…?” “And then you strangle that bitch until she’s dead.” “What does that even mean?” Ayako shrugged. “I dunno, really. But it worked for me. And I’m glad it did, because I could never have hooked up with my ex girlfriend if I was afraid to be loud around people.” “I thought you said your ex was the one who taught you how to do that in the first place?” “Oh, no, that was a different ex girlfriend.” Sumomo stared blankly at Ayako. “We’re fifteen. How many ex girlfriends could you possibly have had?” Ayako hummed thoughtfully. “…Depends on how you define ‘girlfriend’.” Sumomo slumped back in her seat. “Yeah, no, we clearly aren’t cut from the same cloth. I have no idea how to be the way you are.” “It’s really not that difficult. You just…” “Shh! Matsumoto and Yamamoto just walked in.” “What, from our class?” “Yeah, they just got into the booth right behind you. Now be quiet.” “Why? It’s not like it matters if they see us here together.” “It matters to me. Now shush.” Ayako shrugged, but stopped talking. Which was when the two of them realized they could overhear the two boys’ conversation almost perfectly. As she eavesdropped on her classmates, Sumomo was surprised at first, then as the conversation went on she started blushing as a strange grin spread across her face. By the time the two boys left the café, she was actually letting out a string of strange, almost creepy little giggles. “Are you all right, Susu?” “All right? I’m better than all right! Did you hear that? Yamamoto x Matsumoto, and with Matsumoto in drag! That’s so hot! I ship it! I don’t usually do real person fic, but come on! Don’t you just want to draw that?” Ayako gave her a somewhat concerned look. “Don’t you think you’re getting a little too into character, Susu?” Sumomo looked up, clearly confused. “What character?”